I Will Never be a Ballerina

Growing up my mom tried to get each of us girls to take ballet. Megan had something wrong with her ankles so it didn't stick, I was too busy trying to be a boy(boys do not take ballet), and Jaimie, well she took ballet for a little bit because she had the long body of a dancer (gag). Then she decided she didn't like it. As you read, I didn't take ballet because I wanted to be a boy. Odd yes, but I found so much joy in being tough, helping dad with Saturday morning projects, and being able to take anyone who looked at me wrong. This desire to be a boy decreased when Daniel was born. When he was born I thought, "Man, he's the real deal. My dad will totally want to do boy stuff with a real boy and not a boyish-girl." Ever since then I have tried to become more of a lady and leave my boy self in the past. At times this is hard to do, I find myself trying to wrestle Whit to the ground(I always get trashed) and taking pride in carrying heavy things. To try to override these masculine qualities I decided to take a ballet class this semester. My teacher complimented me and my posture and hand position.

"That looks beautiful Lindsay," my instructor said.

I loved my ballet class and after hearing my teacher's compliment I thought I must be good. I decided I liked the class so much I would work really hard and maybe take another ballet class next semester.

While in class one morning practicing first position I noticed it was difficult because my knees were touching. I looked around and no one else's knees were touching. Whats wrong with mine? I want to be the best little ballerina in here! I went to the next class a little early to get the instructors help. I told her my knees touch when I am in first position. She looked at my stance and notified me that I was quite knocked kneed. She then went on to say that the slight curvature in my spine would make it difficult to do pleas correctly.

One blow after another! My dreams to be a ballerina were dashed. So, sorry mom it just wasn't meant to be.